Tag Archives: forgive yourself

How to Heal Yourself of the Memories of the Past

Ye did run well; who did hinder you that ye should not obey the truth?

Galatians 5:7 KJV

A

Admit/Accept

Don’t make excuses. Meditate on yourself; become real and genuine to yourself and let yourself know the truth about you and accept it. 


C

Confess

Looking in the mirror; be truthful with oneself.


F

Forgive

Looking in the mirror, forgive yourself. Don’t be cynical of yourself; be straightforward. Look in the mirror and say:

“I know this road is not going to be easy. I know my life has got to change, but because this road is not going to be easy, I have to prepare myself for the road ahead. I have to be on guard and be watchful of my heart, mind, and soul and be on guard at all times. Letting my words be few, quick to hear, slow to speak, quick to understand and slow to make any judgement about the situations that I’m confronted with on a daily basis. So help me Yeshua.” 


” But what saith it? The word is nigh thee, even in thy mouth, and in thy heart: that is, the word of faith, which we preach; That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.”

Romans 10:8-9 KJV

Weigh It Before You Say It Part 1

Take a look at these questions:

  • Have you ever responded to a question someone has given you without first hearing the info?
  • How you ever given a response to someone out of your emotions without thinking?
  • How often have you spoken negatively about a situation knowing the full facts?
  • Do you make statements about things that have nothing to do with you?
  • Are there times where being quiet was the best policy but you said something anyway?
  • Did you ever say something about anyone and made the situation worse rather than better?
  • Have you ever made a promise to someone because of time constraints especially when you didn’t know you had the in the first place.

Weigh it before you say. Does anyone recall the statement: Jesus if you get me out of this situation this time, I promise I won’t do it again Jesus. I’ll start back going to Church again. Oh Hallelujah. In any case you wind up doing the same thing over again. A lot of times we’ll make statements like that and we won’t fulfill it. In Matthew it says that you have to give account of every word you speak.

Matthew 12:30-37

He that is not with me is against me; and he that gathereth not with me scattereth abroad. Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men. And whosoever speaketh a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come. Either make the tree good, and his fruit good; or else make the tree corrupt, and his fruit corrupt: for the tree is known by his fruit. O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things. But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.

How can you love My word and hate Me, and how can you hate the Word and love Me? You will not be forgiven for a LONG TIME if you blaspheme against the Holy Ghost. You say “Lord, I will do this,” and you put a stipulation on the Lord. “Lord I’ll do this…if You give me this.” Lord I will do this…tomorrow. Weigh it before you say it. A lot of times we blurt something out of our mouth that didn’t even make sense when we were thinking about it. We don’t think. You remember the moment when they got on your last nerves and you just blurted something out? When people make statements that they haven’t rationally dealt with before they speak. When you say something out of your mouth its a contract between you and that individual. Now, whether its a hate contract, loving contract, disposition of anger, or whatever the case may be, when you say it out of your mouth. That’s a binding contract. “I can’t stand your guts!” Have you ever seen their guts? Have you ever though about what you said before you said it? Did you know that most people say things out of emotion more than reason and reality? Because of that fact, they get caught in a present tense disaster. How many know what love at first sight is? When you hear that, your eyes get really big and swell, arrows are flying, hearts are popping. That’s not reality. You can admire someone at first sight, but you can’t be in love at first sight, because you don’t know them. So why are people always saying I love you? Because they want something? The mindset of people is to do one thing, they want to utilize you for whatever reason, they say I love you because its a submissive word. Love bears all, believes all, love hopes all things, endures all things love never fails…Most say I love you because they want to bring you down to their knees to be submissive to them. “If you love me, then you’ll do whatever I say.” Why do people want people to love them? Think about it. People want love because they want acceptance. I was a nerd in school, with a pocket protector. But I was never one to looks for the gang or look for someone to accept me, because I couldn’t be anyone but me.

James 1: 15-24

Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.Do not err, my beloved brethren. Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. Of his own will begat he us with the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures. Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass: For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straightway forgetteth what manner of man he was.

“James 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.” What someone says about you doesn’t make it so. What they say doesn’t mean anything. They need a crowd to turn and say people about you to convince you that you are no good. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Its when you think that you aren’t fearfully and wonderfully made. Forgive yourself for talking about yourself. Its when we get in the mirror and talk about ourselves. “Look at you!” Why do we do that to ourselves. No one’s said a thing to us, but we’ve created a whole scenario about ourselves. What people say about you means nothing. God made a definite statement of who you are and what you are. So what comes out of your mouth can hinder you. Understand, we condemn ourselves more than the world does, and we abide with what we say about ourselves. Isn’t that true? Are you ready to commit to something?

[At this point in the service, the Holy Ghost moved upon the room, and Pastor Catron spoke into the lives of those present].

Giving back to Jesus!

We’re going to be talking about a particular subject that is dealing with life. I will be talking to you about some important things that a lot of us go through; a lot of us deal with; and that is ourselves. How many know themselves? When you know yourself, you don’t know yourself. That wasn’t a trap that was just to let you know that when you say “I know myself,” no, you don’t, you don’t know yourself. Because in certain situations you change who you really are. The thing is, is this, most people don’t know themselves, but they say they know themselves. That is the average feeling for everybody, “I know myself.” You think you know yourself, because you think you have seen yourself do certain things and react a certain way. So you know yourself. But do you know that every thing that comes in your life, always takes a different choice of mindset; a different action? See, we always think that we have the answers for everything. But the thing is is this, we don’t know ourselves and since we don’t know ourselves, then we need to figure out who we are. The only way to figure out who we are is to find out what others think. No! It doesn’t matter what others think because people will put you in a box, seal that box and ship it off to somewhere else. But, you want someone who really knows you. And in order for somebody to know you, they have to have a relationship with you. If you’ve got that relationship that means you spend time with them.

Its so funny, when a guy meets a girl, ABC of relationships. When a guys meets a girl, the guy looks at the girl and the girl looks at the guy. The one thing the guys looks for is how she looks. The girl looks at “hmmm….I wonder what he’s like?” So, the girl begins to explore while the guy has already found because they are looking at what they want. That’s why when a girl and guy get into a relationship, she wants to spend time. Everything is based upon time. When a guy says ok “I’m sitting down, your sitting down, we’re both watching TV,” or “We’re both going to eat dinner,” that is considered time for them. We want to spend time, not just any kind of time, but quality time. Why? Because women value moments of time. Men do sometimes, but women value it all the time, that is how they measure it up. The quality of time is not just quality, but quality of quality time. They remember the little things like, you stroked my finger. Guys go like why are you stroking my finger? Is there something wrong with you? Now, I’m getting to a point, because women value quality time, men value quantity of time. In other words, men look for time spent over a period of time, women look for that quality time in that time frame. I want everything. If you could put it in that little space, I want it all. They want all they can get within that time frame. “Look into my eyes.” If I am stroking your hair and shoulders and looking away from you, am I giving you quality time? No. But the point is, you build up a relationship over a period of time, not in 5 seconds. So that means you have to add something into that before that quality can be made.

This is the same thing Christ is asking for. You can’t get Christ in 5 seconds. You cannot know who He is in 5 seconds. How do you find out who He is? Over time. But you have to spend quality time. The thing is is that when you give Him quality time, He gives you quantity and quality. Quantity and quality. Remember that. The price of that time that you spend with Christ is priceless. My wife always comes to me and says “Honey, I have to spend time with Jesus.” Alright, but you saw Him yesterday I say. She wanted not just to fall on her knees and say “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, I love You, I love You” and walk out, she wants to spend that time where she is meditating on Him and she can see. And that is what we all should be trying to strive for, that quality time with Him. First of all, you’ve got to get time. I’ve never seen anyone…anyone who says they spend time with Jesus, and they walk into a prayer room, sit down for 5 minutes, get up and walk away saying “I just got through spending quality time with Jesus!” Have you ever seen someone do that? If you did they didn’t spend anytime with Jesus. That was time with themselves. They probably were sleeping half that time. So we need to realize that we need to spend that quality time with Him.

Quality time is important for one thing, and I’ll say this: if you have Him inside, you’re able to give back. You’re able to express yourself wholeheartedly. Which leads me to what we’re talking about today. We have to give back to Him. When God gives you something, He wants it back. He just doesn’t want it back any kind of way, He wants it back with quality and quantity. When you give somebody quality time, they are the only ones on your mind. How many of you when you go to take a math test, think about English? If you do I don’t want to see your grades. If you have a math test, your mind should be focused on the math. If you are in love with this person, your mind should be focused on who? That person. If you are going to spend quality time with that person your mind should be spent where? That time frame. This is not a strange language. The point is you have to spend that time, you have to give that time back to that individual. You cannot take from, take from. You know there are givers and takers in the world? A person that is a taker, no matter what will always have their hand out. But you never give back. You have to be able to give back. Never always have your hand out, but never always have your hand clinched. You have to be able to do both, and learn how to do both. Learn who you are in relationship with. Teach yourself how to love that individual and that individual alone. We have to learn how. Teach ourselves how to appreciate the quality of time that we spend with that individual. Have you ever heard of the 3 step program with anyone caught on drugs or alcohol? There is a program. You can’t just tell someone whose been drinking for the last 40 years “alright, just say these words, and believe these words, and you’ll be free from alcohol!” As a Pastor, I’ve been invited to a lot of different programs. I was invited to an alcoholics anonymous program to sit in and observe the whole group. As I did, it starts off like this “My name is John. Its been 4 days 7 weeks and 5 hours since I’ve been free from alcohol.” Then everyone else goes very monotone “Hi, John.” The next person goes “My name is Mary. Its been 1 year and 8 months since I haven’t drank some alcohol.” Then everyone else says “Yay, Mary.” Now if that doesn’t make you want to back and drink I don’t know what will. That mindset was so dry. If you were freed from something, wouldn’t you be jumping and shouting? That is why those programs don’t help anybody. It reminds you, because the whole time you’re confessing that you don’t drink beer anymore, you’re thinking about beer. “I stopped smoking last week.” And the whole time you can’t wait to get in your car and catch a buzz. This is the problem that we’re dealing with.

What does this have to do with a relationship? Well it has a lot to do with a relationship. Because if you are still bound by a previous relationship…and you haven’t let go of that, you still will be bound. Saying you are free from a relationship doesn’t make you free. So, the thing that we have to realize is you must first deal with you. Love you, forgive you, deal with you. I tell this to everyone: we are our own worst enemy. Nobody can do anything to us unless we allow it. So when we allow people to do things to us whose fault is it? Ours. So we must forgive who? Ourselves for being stupid, right? We have to forgive ourselves because we make mistakes. Wounds don’t heal until we forgive ourselves. But don’t let your mistake become your crutch. We allow the mistake to become our crutch, then we’ll always be leaning on that crutch. Well, why couldn’t you do this? “Because this (crutch) happened. Because this (crutch) happened. Because, you see what they’ve done to me? You see how they treat me? You see where they take me to? You see how nobody loves me anymore?” You can’t live for nobody. There is only one Person you can live for. You know who that is? Christ. You have to get you together. The first person you need to do is you. The next thing you need to do is figure out all the things that hold you. The past will never let you go as long as you have it in your pocket.

We tend to want to hold onto things because you know why? We’ve built a relationship with it. We’ve spent time with it. We’ve nurtured it. We’ve given it all the love and attention that we thought it needed. Oh my gosh, is that where that love and relationship comes in? When you nurture something, that means you give it all your focus and attention. And when you do that what happens to that thing? Does it every go away? You build a strong relationship. And to tell yourself that you have to let that go hurts, because its gotten you through the cold times, through the winter time, through the heart aches and pains. It was there for you. You stroked it and made it feel good and gave it a pedestal in your life, and when you gave it a pedestal in your life, it did what? It took over your life. Relationships are important. Building up time, but with whom and with what you build up time with. Because whatever binds you to this life, believe me you’ve built up a relationship with that thing. See, we build up relationships with people, but we build relationships with things, or situations; with everything that shouldn’t be. And then we wonder why we can’t get something in our lives. You know why they call things habits? You nurtured it you stroked it.

Why do we do the things we do? What do you do every morning when you get up that is a ritual to you? We do something every morning and we don’t even think about it; we do it automatically. The same way that you do what you do in the morning, other people think about doing evil like that in the morning. Thinking about how they will set someone up today. Who will I mess with today. I’m gonna jack somebody up. You know why they are like that? Because they’ve built up a relationship with that habit. So its nurtured into their system, its who they are. The Bible says “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he” Proverbs 23:7. You act according to what you think, because you make that determination. When you think you are something, the Bible says, you are nothing, Galatians 6:3. You begin to plan your life. You plan your life based upon who? Whatever your name is verse 1 paragraph 6. According to yourself. You begin to conduct your life in that direction. That you think is correct. That you feel is correct. That you understand…the way that YOU… The point is is this, so a man thinketh so is he. You think you’re something, and you begin to gravitate to yourself, because if it isn’t about you… How many know that this world isn’t about you? So if you think yourself something there are a million other people thinking the exact same thing. So if everyone thinks themselves to be something, then is anyone gonna help each other? No. Why? Because you need to help me. Your beliefs aren’t based upon Christ, its based on you. If you feel then its your will.  Words are powerful. When you throw them out there, they can kill, they can cause someone to be broken and bound; you can belittle someone so bad, they will go out and shoot themselves. Playing the dozens.

We don’t realize how we allow ourselves, to take over other peoples personalities or mindsets by focusing on us. Some may say but you’ve got to build yourself up, you have to be strong. Does your strength lie at the mercy of hurting somebody? Do you need somebody to be hurt before you feel good? Do you have to take from them before you realize who you are? Do you need somebody else to validate who you are? Some people do. I’m not who I am until I’m validated by you all. Some people need that to validate their self worth. Do you believe you’re somebody?

Most people can’t accept the idea of being alone. Most people don’t want to be alone. Anything that would associate them being alone, they tend to steer away from that. When you make a decision, you don’t want to be alone, when you do something, you don’t want to be alone. You want someone that will give you support in what you do. So we try to always surround ourselves with someone who needs, because we want them to need us. We want someone around so that we can feel like someone needs me. Someone desires me, I’m not who I want to be, I’m trying to get to where I want to be something. I need somebody to need me. I don’t feel good about myself, because I don’t think someone else feels good about myself. You ever find yourself sometimes always trying to ask questions to someone so they can relate back to you what they think of you? We really don’t want the truth, but we want the truth. “What do you think about so and so? How do you feel about so and so? Do you like my daughter?” We know we have those qualities in ourselves sometimes, because if you like that quality then you must like me.

How many of you have true friends? Would they give their life for you? If not, then they aren’t you friend. Are you sure they will stand by you? If someone has a gun pointed straight at your head, will they take a bullet for you? Can you say for sure? There is One who already took a bullet for you, and died upon the cross for you. They got in front of bullet for you, and said They’d take it, and you never met Him. Greater love has no man than to lay down his life for a friend. So no you don’t have any friends, I don’t have any friends. I have associates, but not friends. Scarcely will someone lay down their life for you without being prompted or paid. Do you want someone who will come every once and a while and says he’ll be your friend or do you want someone you can call at the drop of a pin and they are there? That is what the Lord did. He said “My friend is in trouble. I will stop what I’m doing and come down and die for you.”

It took me some years to learn this, because I was stuck on me. When I graduated from the university, I thought I was “it.” I had the sports car. I took care of what I possessed and took pride in what I owned. That is who I was. Key word was. It was a task, not to be perfect. Who was I fighting against? Me. I set myself up for failure; for fault, not even realizing. The point is, I had to learn how not to be me. Me always gets in the way. I’m always tripping over me. I had to learn how to get me out of the way first before I could love or serve God. Even though my intention was to serve Him. What I wanted to do, He didn’t want me to do. I ran away from the Lord for 25 years, because it didn’t come the way I wanted it to come. I gave up, and surrendered. A lot of people say surrender, but its surrender with conditions. We are constantly doing things to make us look good so that people will accept us. My whole heart was into me, and it was the hardest thing in the world to let me go. When I let me go and said Lord here I am…mold me. Do you want to be molded? You want Him to put you on a potters will, and shape you the way He wants? That means you have to do one thing: give up/surrender. Totally. Totally means everything, nothing left. When you surrender, its like being in the military. When you throw your hands up, you won’t contest anything. Surrender means no contest. No contesting, no talk back, whining or excuses. We have to be real. Lord if you say go, I will go. Inside we question God and say “why did You allow this,” or “Why me?” And He says because I told you to. Don’t question it. Don’t say you’re My child when you are disobedient and can’t do what I say. Why do I have to beg you, prod you, slap you, cause sickness to come upon you because you can’t do what I tell you to do? Why can’t you just do it? Because it goes against what you want. Its easy just go ahead and do it.

If we aren’t obedient to our Father in Heaven, He will chasten those whom He loves. He won’t kill us, He’s trying to make us, not break us. Some say “well He’s God and He won’t do anything to us.” He doesn’t disciple us the way we want to be disciplined, He does it His way so we can heal.

Luke 12: 1-15

In the mean time, when there were gathered together an innumerable multitude of people, insomuch that they trode one upon another, he began to say unto his disciples first of all, Beware ye of the leaven of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy. For there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; neither hid, that shall not be known. Therefore whatsoever ye have spoken in darkness shall be heard in the light; and that which ye have spoken in the ear in closets shall be proclaimed upon the housetops. And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do. But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him. Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows. Also I say unto you, Whosoever shall confess me before men, him shall the Son of man also confess before the angels of God: But he that denieth me before men shall be denied before the angels of God. And whosoever shall speak a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but unto him that blasphemeth against the Holy Ghost it shall not be forgiven. And when they bring you unto the synagogues, and unto magistrates, and powers, take ye no thought how or what thing ye shall answer, or what ye shall say: For the Holy Ghost shall teach you in the same hour what ye ought to say. And one of the company said unto him, Master, speak to my brother, that he divide the inheritance with me. And he said unto him, Man, who made me a judge or a divider over you? And he said unto them, Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.

Your value is not based on the things you own. You may own a Lamborghini Countach. You may live in Signature of Solon. You may have your own private jet. It doesn’t tell you who you are. They don’t make you who you are. Don’t let anyone judge you according to what you wear, what you buy, what you look like, or where you live at.

Luke 12: 16-39

And he spake a parable unto them, saying, The ground of a certain rich man brought forth plentifully: And he thought within himself, saying, What shall I do, because I have no room where to bestow my fruits? And he said, This will I do: I will pull down my barns, and build greater; and there will I bestow all my fruits and my goods. And I will say to my soul, Soul, thou hast much goods laid up for many years; take thine ease, eat, drink, and be merry. But God said unto him, Thou fool, this night thy soul shall be required of thee: then whose shall those things be, which thou hast provided? So is he that layeth up treasure for himself, and is not rich toward God. And he said unto his disciples, Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat; neither for the body, what ye shall put on. The life is more than meat, and the body is more than raiment. Consider the ravens: for they neither sow nor reap; which neither have storehouse nor barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls? And which of you with taking thought can add to his stature one cubit? If ye then be not able to do that thing which is least, why take ye thought for the rest? Consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet I say unto you, that Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. If then God so clothe the grass, which is to day in the field, and to morrow is cast into the oven; how much more will he clothe you, O ye of little faith?  And seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither be ye of doubtful mind. For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your Father knoweth that ye have need of these things. But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you. Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom. Sell that ye have, and give alms; provide yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure in the heavens that faileth not, where no thief approacheth, neither moth corrupteth. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. Let your loins be girded about, and your lights burning; And ye yourselves like unto men that wait for their lord, when he will return from the wedding; that when he cometh and knocketh, they may open unto him immediately. Blessed are those servants, whom the lord when he cometh shall find watching: verily I say unto you, that he shall gird himself, and make them to sit down to meat, and will come forth and serve them. And if he shall come in the second watch, or come in the third watch, and find them so, blessed are those servants. And this know, that if the goodman of the house had known what hour the thief would come, he would have watched, and not have suffered his house to be broken through.

Verse 34 is very important. Where you put your trust, there will your heart be. So when the Lord comes back…will He find you doing or just talking about it? Anybody can say they’re a child of God.

Luke 12:40-49

Be ye therefore ready also: for the Son of man cometh at an hour when ye think not. Then Peter said unto him, Lord, speakest thou this parable unto us, or even to all? And the Lord said, Who then is that faithful and wise steward, whom his lord shall make ruler over his household, to give them their portion of meat in due season? Blessed is that servant, whom his lord when he cometh shall find so doing. Of a truth I say unto you, that he will make him ruler over all that he hath. But and if that servant say in his heart, My lord delayeth his coming; and shall begin to beat the menservants and maidens, and to eat and drink, and to be drunken; The lord of that servant will come in a day when he looketh not for him, and at an hour when he is not aware, and will cut him in sunder, and will appoint him his portion with the unbelievers. And that servant, which knew his lord’s will, and prepared not himself, neither did according to his will, shall be beaten with many stripes. But he that knew not, and did commit things worthy of stripes, shall be beaten with few stripes. For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more. I am come to send fire on the earth; and what will I, if it be already kindled?

It’s an awesome thing to stand before the presence of an awesome God. Its even more awesome to stand in the presence of a God that you’ve been obedient to. Its an awesome thing to be obedient. We’ve covered a lot of scriptures and talked about a lot of things. But I don’t want you to get everything. I just want you to get what was for you. A word for you today to know about you. This is the most important thing I want you to get: Its a powerful thing when you’re obedient to the Will of God. Surrender and don’t contest. Your arms are too short to box with God. We cannot fight God. If you are suppose to be a servant of God, what does a servant do when the master asks him? Obey, whether it fits your schedule or not. He said you are to love Him. Did He say that we can love Him our way? No. Because our way might be off the wall. Love me. How do you love the Lord? With your whole heart…in truth. I may get down on my knees and call Him multiple times, that is my way. Your way may be to raise your hands, but you are talking to Him. As long as you do it in spirit and truth, from your whole heart. Obedience is better than sacrifice 1 Samuel 15:22. So if you are told to do something whether you want to or not, if God wants to see it of you, just do it. We have to get us out of the way to stop questioning.